My play dates should comment here about their experiences.

Here is a post area that I've set up for my subs to comment about their sessions with me.

The ex's session

Some were wondering how the ex did for his real domination experience. He did very well. There is a pic of him in my walmart dog collars. Youll notice they actually match his outfit. The nice thing about the walmart dog collars is that they come in a variety of colors. They dont look quite as sturdy as the wider leather looking collars that the adult stores sell, but as long as you buy sturdy ones they do the trick really well. you can connect them with carabiners or chains or you can even use walmart brought dog leashes to tie your guy up. Also, if you dont have a bed post like I dont, you can still strap your sub to the bed. just attach your dog collar to dog leash and or a lashing strap (found in the camping or utility departments) and run it under the mattress. If you run it all the way under and to the other side and tie something big around it, it is really quite secure. Ill try to get a picture of this one day. But I digress from the original subject of my post. So, I did not do a whole lot of exciting things with mark. just some spanking, some bondage, and a nice ass pounding from a big dildo. that part was the most fun. I was surprised by how much he was able to take. I finally got my front porch cleared up or at least mostly organized. I did not do a lot of domination or humiliation with him. In truth, I did not want to. It just felt like he was not the right guy to dominate. He isnt the right guy in general for me, and so it seemed like just a kink fix or a skills practice session. Although it was fun, especially the parts where he had to use his tongue, it just felt like he wasnt the right guy for domination and that kind of tainted the experience. Anyways that was last week, and ive been busy and havent gotten around to writing about it till now. But just today I had a much better experience with sissy r, which ill have to write about later when I have more time.

Mistress Yelanda's 5 rules of submission

The five key components of submission are obedience, honesty, trust, respect, and desire. I think if you cover these five components, everything else will fall into place.

Obedience is the key to submission and the foundation of any flr.
True honesty lays the submissive bare and vulnerable to his mistress.
Trust in a mistress is necessary for true submission.
Respect is proven through obedience, behavior, and acceptance of the mistress' lead.
Desire to submit and serve a mistress is a preexisting requirement.

Finger fucking an ex husband

So last night after class, I stopped at my ex husbands apartment and gave him a very good finger fucking. How this came to occur is an interesting story. First let me give you some history. So, Ive been divorced from my ex husband, will call him Mark, for a few years, but Id kicked him out the house a few years before that, so it has been a rather long while since we’ve been together. Of all the men that I would like to dominate, I have to say I would have chosen him absolutely last. Of course he doesn’t know this. There has been way too much water under the bridge and I could never get back together with him, but I was horny and the couple of subs I am talking to right now have schedules that don’t coincide with mine. So, that’s how I ended up at my ex husbands apartment for a nice session of domination for the first time ever. I put him to the wall first, which is how I love to start off a domination session. I gave him a nice spanking open handed, and I was so surprised by how much he liked it. Its very enjoyable to spank a man who likes it so much, but I didn’t want to go too far with him for his first spanking. Afterwards I lubed him up well and entered his ass with my finger. Wonderfull, I went slow with him, and he easily took one then two. I already knew he would love this as we did used to do this in our marriage a lot. I moved him to all fours on his bed with his ass in the air, and went to work on 3 fingers. He was so responsive it was a big turn on. Then I got 4 fingers in his ass, something I would never have tried in our marriage, and I was in heaven, because I knew with a little practice Id be able to get my whole fist in there. What a wonderfull thing to look forward to. I was running out of time since this had to be a quick stop as I had other things to do already and realy I only meant it to be a quick taste test for him to see if he could handle it. I had him wait there for a second while I went to wash my hands. When I got back I couldn’t resist the urge to spank him a few times with his belt. He took it so well. So now, I will be seeing him again tomorrow for a real session. Cant wait. Poor sissy R was wanting to get together tomorrow, but he got pushed back till next week so I can give my ex husband a real good fucking. 

Are women superior to men?

Are women superior to men?

Women and men are different. Each gender brings a set of skills and innate abilities to the table and both are necessary for a healthy society. When we speak of superiority of one gender over the other we run the risk of becoming a sort of gender racist. This is not a place we want to be in femdom. I believe that women, in general, are better at communicating, collaborating, organizing and leading. I also believe that women are the natural leaders and caretakers of their families and should be the only gender allowed to lead governments and societies. 

What is FemDom?

I believe that in its simplest terms, Femdom is a type of relationship in which the female partner is more dominant than the male. The term does have broader applications though as in some relationships that are termed femdom both partners are female and in others there are more than 2 partners. In all femdom relationships male partners are required to submit to females. It is my belief that the men that seek femdom or female lead relationships both want and need to submit to their women. Whether the need to submit is biological or psychological in nature I cant truly say, but I suspect that although psychology plays a factor, submission is a physiological innate need.  It seems that most women come into femdom relationships at a prompting from boyfriends and husbands and spend a lot of time getting used to the idea. The intensity level of domination and the tools used by a female to dominate her submissive vary widely. Ive recognized four common types of femdom relationships. 

     The first is short term. You can define this as just getting together to play. The partners meet and then separate after a set period of time. They are not likely emotionally attached to one another. I think professional dominatrix fall into this category. You can have any level of domination intensity short term. I believe it is more difficult however for the sub to develop the type of trust that is required to truly submit in this type of relationship.  

     The second type of femdom ive noticed is bedroom femdom. In this type the female is in complete control in the bedroom. Her domination is focused on her mates sexuality and in their sexual relationship. Her domination may move naturally out of the bedroom and into some aspects of everyday life, but her mate maintains an air of control or at least equality in most other aspects of their lives and relationship. 

     The third type is the most common type of femdom relationship. What most of us would consider the average female led relationship, wife led marriage, or loving female authority relationship. The partners are emotionally attached to one another and there is usually an air of permanence whether the sub is a bf or husband. The intensity of domination varies but it is not usually extremely controlling in the average femdom relationship. There is usually the use of some type of BDSM kink, but again this is not usually of the extreme type. Male chastity and orgasm control are frequently used tools, as well as spankings for sensual play and punishment. Men are usually required to do some housework and show some service to their women. 

     In the fourth type is the extreme femdom relationship. It is the same as the third only taken to more extreme levels. The female controls every aspect of her males life in this type, from his sexuality, to his career and finances, to his food choices. This is the category for those men who wish to be slaves. I can not yet say what drives a male to need this type of control in his life, but I know that the need is out there and that many men need to be owned by a loving female authority. I also don’t think that the average femdom woman is really comfortable owning or training a slave. The intensity of domination can vary in this type but it tends towards the most extreme.  

     This is how I see femdom and categorize it. I would like to work with some other women in forming a femdom training center to both support femdom women in their endeavors and provide training for both dommes and subs in femdom. Any comments and oppinions are greatly appreciated.

On Monogamy

Here are my feelings on monogamy. Ive spent my entire vanilla life as a monogamous person. It seemed to work well for me and I was very proud of my record of monogamous loyalty. But now as Ive reconnected with myself (in a sence), I realize that I don’t have any of the strong feelings of the rightness of monogamy that I expected I should. Instead I can see circumstances where having two mates could come in handy. So, Ive had to ask myself do I still believe in monogamy, in reality, did I ever really believe in it in the first place. Ive always fantasized of having two men in my life, one older and one younger, both being good at different things, having unequal abilities and skills but equally important to the relationship. In my dream world, one is the alpha and one the subordinate male, and it would take some finesse on my part to manage the two of them. So, I have to admit that although I played the part very well, I never really believed that there was anything inherently so much better about monogamy. Yet, Im still very proud of my record of loyalty. And here is why. I don’t have any strong feelings one way or the other in respect to the correctness of monogamy. But I do have strong feelings of doing what is right for my mate. So, if my man needs me to be monogamous, than I am proud to provide for him by being so. Now, this may seem opposite to the ideals of female domination. But I don’t think so. I believe that in D/s relationships the dominant partner has a lot of responsibilities towards the submissive partner, the most important of which is to know their needs and provide for the most important needs of mates and family. I do say needs, not every single want. There is a big difference between the two. So, my feelings are that yes, I can easily be a monogamous person, and will do so if necessary for my mate and family.